A window into my soul.

Sorry I have been MIA the past few days. In a perfect world I would love to blog it up with you folks each and every day...but, truth is, I dyed my hair back to blond last Friday, and my husband has been all over me ever since. Luckily he is snoring on the couch, so I can have some upright me time.

Unfortunately, I really have no dramatic home news, other than the fact that toddler can now open the fridge, and repeatedly takes off with the tartar sauce. Weird. So I have been tying the door handles together with string, so I hope that it not only stops the tartar sauce bandit, but it also helps me avoiding opening it to feed my face.

So, other than that awesome-ness, the only other thing that has peaked my interest as of late, is the trashy TV my DVR and I share in the wee hours of the night, after the boys hit the hay.

So, I thought, why not create one post touching on all the scandalous details of the trash I spend hours watching, just to get it off my chest. And, you can either love this post, pretend you have no idea what I am talking about, and secretly love this post, or truly be one of the tv-less wonders I so admire, and skip over this completely. Just avert your eyes and check out the yummy lettuce wrap post below.

America's Next Top Model...I have been privy to the hour of fierceness since cycle one. I love ANTM. Best part is around episode 3 when they all get makeovers, aka, hack the skinny bitch's hair off, and give the sassy ones weaves. I can't tell you how much I love watching the beauty queens cry when Tyra cuts off their long blond hair, and gives them black mohawks. This cycle's pick...Plus size girl Whitney, just because I want the curvy diva to have her day in the sun.

The Hills...This is my most embarrassing indulgence...I think. I mean, previous seasons were a bit easier to watch, now the Heidi's face looks like it's formed of silly putty. Hot Tranny Mess say what? I mean, I know it's fake. I can see, visibly, that it is fake...and yet, I am drawn to their tacky world of Les Deux and Justin Bobby. Even that little albino, machiavellian troll, Spencer Pratt, is entertaining to watch at times.

American Idol...so I have a crush on Jason Castro, the dread lock guy. I am not sure if he is even talented, I just get all giddy when he smiles, like when Kurt Cameron was on tv. What a dreamboat. I feel like I should get a diary with a small, but highly breakable lock on it, and doodle Brittany Castro all over the pages. Back to the point, I enjoy the show, though I do not vote, nor do I purchase the winner's CDs. I feel like instead of American Idol, they should call it, Who Wants to be the Next Barry Manilow, because all they do is sing lamer versions of other people's songs.

Real World/Road Rules Challenge/Gauntlet/Inferno/Whatever...Yes, I realize I am years past target MTV demographic, but I can't help myself. I love watching all the crazies compete in senseless challenges by day, and drunk wrestle by night. Plus, I have a crush on Johnny Bananas.

The L Word...I have a total girl crush on Shane. And, I watch it because the story lines and characters are phenomenal, but my hubby watches it for the girly touchy touchy. A must watch.

The Tudors...Season two tonight! Who would have thought a ultra provocative Henry IIIVth drama would be so memorizing, a must watch as well.

I am anxiously awaiting the return of some all time favorites like The Office, Big Love...thank goodness How I Met You Mother is back (Robin Sparkles...click it...find out what it's all aboot!).

I still get teary when I think of Arrested Development, Dead Like Me, or Studio 60. Fools! How could you cancel greatness such as that!?

Wow, am I contributing to the fall of modern civilization or what?

Either way, check these shows out. I know I am always left smiling and satisfied...that's what she said.